Many of us struggle to get things done – whether that’s a long term work project or simply folding the laundry (ok, maybe especially folding the laundry).

There are many wonderful motivational speakers and resources that offer anything from gentle encouragement to a proverbial kick in the rear to help folks accomplish their goals. I am not one of these people, and this is not a motivational article.

This is about the things we need besides motivation to accomplish a goal, and how to make those things work for you. 

We can’t stop habits from forming and nor do we want to!  Habits help us!  Habits are great when they work for us and not against us.  Whenever we want to change our routines, we need to change our habits.  This is especially true every time there’s a change in season or a change in routine.  Think back to the end of August and the beginning of September.  There’s a lot of change in a couple short weeks.  Not having habits and routines that support you can make changing things harder than it needs to be.

Changing habits can be as easy as making the new habit easy or making something we want to stop doing more difficult.  As humans, we naturally gravitate towards easy over hard - let that work for you in this case!

We’ve been chatting about how habits are formed, how they affect your daily life and how to start making changes. If you didn’t catch the previous two articles, you can read them here: How Habits Affect Your Life + How to Make them Work for You and How to Change Your Habits and Make it Stick - Part 1.

Simply put, habits are an unconscious response to a specific stimulus. If you get cut off in traffic, what’s your automatic response? If you’re feeling stressed, what’s your go-to solution? If your pet or child comes to see you and wants a hug, what’s your response?

"Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity." - Health as defined by the World Health Organization

I've come to believe that if I want to thrive, I must invest in my health. If I want to merely survive, I can treat health as an expense and treat symptoms as they arise.  For years I treated my health as an expense and opted for the cheapest solution.  I struggled with iron deficiency anemia, chronic fatigue syndrome, debilitating periods and more.  Unlike most practitioners, I understand chronic illness and the struggles it creates because I’ve lived with it.

Couples counselling is always a learning experience for all parties. I wanted to offer a glimpse behind-the-scenes of couples counselling, but that is a tall order! Each session, each couple, is so unique; that processes vary tremendously. 

So, here are a few surprising lessons that I’ve seen couples learn during relationship counselling.